How to Get Rid of Bad Habits?

We all know the feeling of doing something which seems wrong, but nevertheless we still do it. We all sometimes crave for one more piece of cake, even though we have eaten more than enough….It can also be the cigarettes that some of us wish to smoke, when we consciously know that it is bad for our health. Worries are another example of bad habits, since they cause us a lot of tension and anxiety and 99% of the things we worry about, never come true. So how can we overcome our bad habits?

Well, our first instinct, is to fight the habit. This is exactly the reason, why most times we try to overcome a habit, it comes back. We give so much energy for rejecting the habit, that it just empowers it. In order to leave a habit behind, you need to just let it go. When you face your current situation with courage and look at your bad habits directly – you see that you are only human and it’s normal. After facing the habits and not denying them, you should try to get rid of them by being more compassionate towards yourself. Instead of beating yourself for doing what you do, you need to give more love and compassion to yourself – this is the key for moving forward. How can you do that?

Start by being a good friend to yourself. Yes…Your relationship with yourself, are probably the most intense one you ever had. Nevertheless, we only sometimes stop and think, if we are being kind enough to ourselves. It seems that we feel comfortable to say terrible things to ourselves, that had we said them in public, we probably won’t had any friends left. When we go to eat another piece of chocolate cake, we might beat ourselves afterwards and say things like ‘I can’t believe I did it, I’m already fat and now I am getting even fatter…I am so irresponsible… maybe there is something wrong with me… etc. Had we say things like that to the people we know, we won’t had any friends left. It seems that we feel comfortable enough with ourselves for not being kind enough. The key for leaving the unhealthy habits behind, is to realize that this attitude only gives more strength to the habit. When you love yourself, you don’t want to do bad things for yourself. When you give more love to yourself, you don’t wish to fill yourself with another piece of cake or another cigarette. When there is someone you love, you make your best to take care of him – you don’t stuck another cigarette to his mouth, you don’t fill his mind with endless worries, etc… You need to treat yourself like you treat the ones you love – When you will act this way, the bad habit will vanish.

For conclusion, try to be a bit more compassionate towards yourself. You might be overweight at the moment, you might smoke a lot or worry too much. But, the main issue is that you still deserve love and compassion and this is the key for change in your life. It reminds me of a nice metaphor – Once the sun and the wind argued who can cause a person to take off his coat. The wind said, it can do it for sure and it started to blow. The wind blew as hard as it can, but the man just kept holding his coat harder and harder. After all its efforts, the wind gave up. Finally, the sun came out, showed it sunny rays and the man instantly removed his coat.

How to overcome Insomnia?

You are lying in bed and you just keep on tossing and turning. The thoughts keep on running through your head. The hour is getting late and you’re still not able to sleep. What to do? How can you function the next day, if you can’t get a reasonable amount of sleep? Well, these are all good questions and I will try to answer them and help you gain a better sleep, by giving you 5 tips you can imply, the next time you are in bed.

First Tip- Don’t fight with your sleep. If you can’t go to sleep within 15 minutes from going to bed- get up and do something else. Try to do some boring activity, you have been putting away for a long time. By doing so you gain two benefits- You become more sleepy (when you lie in bed and force yourself to sleep- you only become more stressed) and you don’t waste your time – you use it in order to complete an activity, that you considered too boring to do in the past.

Second Tip- You can count on your body to get the amount of sleep you need. If you have slept only a few hours last night or havn’t slept at all- there is no reason for worry and that is because your body will find the time to gain the sleep it needs. You might go to sleep earlier after not getting much sleep the night before or maybe you will catch up after a few sleepless nights. Either way- your body will know how to maintain itself and get the rest it needs. You should trust your body, listen to it and give it the option for proper rest when it needs it.

I think that Tohomas Edison and his sleep patterns are very inspiring and they are described by his wife in the book “The power of positive thinking” by Norman Vincent Peale- “It was Mr.Edison’s custom to come into the house from his laboratory after many hours of labor and lie down on his old couch. He would fall asleep as naturally as a child, in perfect relaxation, sinking into a deep and untroubled slumber. After three or four, or sometimes even five hours he would become instantly wide awake, completely refreshed, and eager to return to his work.”

Third Tip- Don’t invite unwanted partners. Imagine yourself lying in bed, while a couple of bears are lying beside you- can you go to sleep like that? Probably not. The same goes to worry, anger or fear. Before getting to bed, you need to let go of all the emotions that can easily keep you awake. How can you let go? By simply letting go. Tell yourself you did your best today and you hope for the best tomorrow. You can also imagine, with your eyes closed, how you remove each disturbing thought. You can see yourself as a tiny person that removes all the disturbing thoughts one by one from your mind.

Fourth Tip- Spend some time alone meditating every day. By doing so you will be able to fall asleep faster and your sleep time will be more efficient. In our days it’s hard to find 15 minutes for yourself, but you must. I believe that spending 15 minutes a day concentrating on your breathing and body sensations, will calm your mind and improve your health.

Fifth Tip- fill your mind with faith and gratitude. Think of all the things you take for granted in your life and you should be feeling more gratitude towards. Keep in mind that not everyone are lucky as you. Even in your worst times, there are still many things you can be thankful for and you can still consider yourself lucky in many ways. Why is it so important? Because it will cause you to feel more joy and happiness, which as a result will calm your mind. In the end this is our biggest purpose- to achieve more happiness, which is much easier than we tend to think. You can achieve it by simply helping others get more happiness and also feeling gratitude for your blessings in life.

What Is Personal Development?

The term personal development is so often used. What is it? Why do we need it? I will share with you my own opinion.

It is a path the individual takes to spread out his greatness to the world. It’s an endless journey of self-improvement. You start the journey by setting goals and by making a commitment to get the best in life. There will be setbacks, but your eyes should remain focused on achieving your dreams. Is there a single point that symbolizes the attainment of the highest wisdom and reaching to your ultimate potential? I will try to answer it in the next lines, by giving an example.

When I travelled through India and Nepal I was intrigued by the bodhisat philosophy. According to the Buddhists, one should try to attain enlightenment in his journey through this universe. He might not achieve it in this life time (they believe in reincarnations), but never the less it should be his highest goal. By enlightenment they mean the attainment of complete control over one’s mind and gaining compassion and wisdom to see things as they really are (without the common desire and aversion that accompanies most of our views). So, it seems that there is a single point that symbolizes the end of the personal development path (at least for the Buddhists). The question is- is there a higher point than that?

When I explored more the eastern philosophy, I discovered there are many streams of Buddhism. One of the main streams, called Mahayana, defines the point of ending the journey only when all other beings attain enlightenment as well. So, it seems that there is a higher goal to strive for after achieving our own desired dreams. It just proves one simple idea- this is an endless road and there will always be a higher cause to pursuit.

For conclusion, walking this endless road, becoming better today than yesterday, and then better tomorrow than today- throughout one’s life- is a true image of the way of personal development.